Blaming mothers for what’s wrong is the patriarchy talking.

Feminists target men because many men are not willing to look at their privilege and acknowledge the power imbalance that systemically keeps women disempowered.

Changing the word to something else erases the truth of what is happening. The patriarchy is a system that favors men over women. It gives power to men (though also damages them) while TAKING power from women. It is called “patriarchy” because it was built by men a long time ago and it unfairly favors men. To call it by any other name is to pretend that the problem is something else and it erases and disempowers women yet again.

Would we change the name of white supremacy to something else so that it didn’t target white people? No, because racism is real and must be looked in the eye in order to be dismantled. That doesn’t mean all white people are horrible, but just that we all must correct this problem. We were raised in a racist society that empowered white people over all others. We have a responsibility to acknowledge that and root it out of ourselves so we don’t pass this on to future generations.

By the same token, we must not rewrite what is happening in gender imbalances and the oppression of the feminine. The patriarchy is real and it empowers and favors men over women. Period. That doesn’t make men the enemy and doesn’t mean all men are horrible people. It just means that men need to be brave enough to examine their privilege and then use it to empower those who have been disempowered.

We are all here to take care of each other.