First of all, oldest of four here, and definitely played the mom role in my family, too. (Though I loved it. LOL.)

Yes on your points here about expectations! I don’t understand how people miss this. They act like others were forced to have kids against their will and that we then owe it to them to help. It’s such a bizarre narrative!

And I think you knowing yourself and how you want to interact based on that knowing is far from selfish. ❤ And don’t forget, this helps the rest of us become stronger with our boundaries, too! xoxo