I kinda regret writing what I wrote having seen this. If anyone felt remotely freak-shamed by what I said, I would be mortified - especially you!! It's hard to walk that line of sharing what turns me off without making it sound like a judgment on others, and I definitely didn't intend for it to sound like a judgment or make your feel like the freak in the back of the room raising her hand with her cheeks burning. Nobody puts Ena in a corner! And certainly not me!!!!!

I can 100% understand why you find this sexy, the way you described it. I don't think it's weird or freakish in the slightest.

For me, it's about a few specific factors: texture, visuals, and power dynamics.

I have no issue with saliva in general. I love tongue kissing more than anything, I love oral sex to kissing and back and again, and I LOVE being licked. Everywhere. Just lay it on me.

I just don't like the texture or visual of a partner dropping one of those long, stringy, loogies onto penises or vulvas. Something about the texture/look of it really turns me off, for one thing, and for another, it brings up issues for me of times I've felt dominated in bed when I didn't give permission for someone to dominate me. I'm more interested in power plays during sex than I ever was before in my life, but that would only come with specific consent and I've never had that in sexual power plays. (In other words, I have a lot of issues there and anything I perceive as dominating behavior when acted upon me without my permission is very triggering for me. Seeing that play out in porn feels equally aggressive and uncomfortable for me to witness.)

So...anyways, I'm really glad you wrote this. And again, I'm very sorry if what I wrote made you or anyone else feel shamed. I'm going to re-read it today and possibly re-word what I said or maybe just delete that whole section.

xoxo