I think you are very perceptive and I appreciate your attention to nuance. I won’t argue with you that I can express regret while claiming not to. I grapple with all the “both/ands” exactly as you write them here. And I think we all do. Isn’t it the human condition to struggle with contentment? Yes: wonderful and frustrating. We can be happy with what we have and still want more. I think you pretty much nailed this.