Oh heavens, I can relate to all of this. I had a guy pull something similar - not from CA, though. (They are everywhere!) He was a counselor for his church. Those men who are in the mental health profession are distinctly guilty for using their expertise to manipulate women. It is dirty, dirty dealing.

Like you, the more I examine what happened to me with the last guy, the more I try to forgive myself. He knew exactly what he was doing every step of the way. How could I have extracted myself from such a complex web of lies and manipulation?

So sorry this happened to you. <3