Wow. This is so powerful. I can relate entirely. In 2017, as MeToo hit, I realized that I had been sexually assaulted daily when I was 12, by the boys at my school. I knew what they were doing was wrong and I spoke up at the time, but my teachers blamed me and said it was normal behavior for boys to do that. So I went my whole life believing I had overreacted. No. I understand now that it was sexual assault.

I also realized that my boyfriend raped me when I was 36. I was taught that once you are in a relationship, that's that. A man can have sex whenever he wants, even if his partner doesn't want it. I don't want to get into the details of that in a comment, but it was violent and still, I didn't believe it was rape until 2017.

It makes me sick that we live in a world that gives men permission to do what they want and then gaslights us into believing it's our fault.

BTW, how brave of you to message your ex. I also looked up once of the boys who used to assault me at school. He had a daughter in his Facebook photos who looked to be about 12. I wanted so badly to message him and say: "How do you feel about your actions now that you have a little girl? How would you feel if someone was sexually assaulting her every day?" But I didn't. I know without a doubt that he doesn't even remember who I am.