Yes, I speak about this in a strong tone because I believe this issue is very important, but I am also a nice person with a big heart who wants to see everyone happy and fulfilled. So thank you for being brave enough to observe my tone and read it anyways - and to read my response and responses to others.

After reading your comment yesterday, I was inspired to write this: https://medium.com/@yaelwolfe/why-we-should-all-leave-the-dating-marketplace-2ff46d109874

I am 100% behind you about how important connection and intimacy are. The only thing I can't get behind is your determination to let your dating experience define your worth. You've read my story of rejection in this piece - and I know if I were a man, you wouldn't (compassionately) write off my experience as an anomaly. In the marketplace piece, you'll learn that I've never been proposed to and never had a man think I was worth having children with. Yes, I've had men pursue me and have had relationships and a bit of casual sex, but so far, none of it has ended well, and I'm in middle age and alone. I could come to the same conclusion as you: that I'm not worthy.

But I won't. And I didn't come to this place because I'm stronger or because I'm a woman and therefore it's easier for me - I came to this place thanks to years of therapy and inner work.

I came to realize that the vase (you'll know what I'm talking about when you read my story about the marketplace) isn't valuable because of what its price tag says, or because a woman thought it was worth more than that. The vase is valuable because someone decided it was important enough to dream into being. Someone decided to create it. Therefore, it has value.

I know I can't necessarily affect your life, me being just a stranger on the internet, but please do not give up and please do not let this world determine your worth. I could make the same argument. I've only ever been useful to men because of sex. I've never been loved by a man. I've been treated like garbage by most of my boyfriends. I have struggled with suicidal depression for a long time, often triggered by abuse by a partner.

If I had made different choices at two important moments in my life, I would not be here right now. And I would have felt justified in my decision, because who would have missed me?

But I stayed and I'm so glad I did. Because I'm finally learning that my worth doesn't depend on whether or not a man will ever love me. The world is affected (hopefully positively) by my presence. It will be different when I'm gone.

That's true for you, too. For everyone.

You seem like a lovely person. The world will someday mourn the loss of you - but hopefully not for a long time. Please don't deprive this world of your presence just because of our culture's toxic B.S. around dating and sex. You are worth so much more than that. And you never know what will come your way when you learn to recognize your inherent worthiness.

(Sorry for any typos - I didn't proofread this.)